Showers, with a chance of tears

I am too nice for my own sanity. Today was myEx-Roomie, Libby the OnlyChild's, Bridal Shower. Why did I go? WHY?! I don't even LIKE the chick. But yeah. I felt bad, so I did.

It was a camping theme because they are going to be having their honeymoon out in the wilderness (and by the way, I *love* to camp. But I would not want my first time to have sex in a sleeping bag on the hard ground, with the likelyhood of boyscouts listening just behind the trees. Both ouch and eew.

Anyway, we were each supposed to bring camping stuff as gifts. I got her a s'mores kit. I had this cute bag and put in a box of graham crackers, 6 Hershey's chocolate bars, a bag of marshmallows and then some hot choclolate and a deck of "strip" poker cards. I wrapped it cute, and I probably spent at least 10 dollars including the gift bags and card and stuff. Not a lot, but that is what I tend to spend for friends... even when I am not unemployed.

But I *am* unemployed, and have been a few MONTHS, and so 10 dollars is sort of a bigger thing right now than usual. And I don't even really LIKE her. But I felt cheap and poor and embarrassed at that shower. I think I was the only one that spent less than 30! And some spent much more. She got a nice 4 person tent, sleeping bags, a nifty cooler, a propane grill... and a bag of s'mores ingredients. SO I felt really cheap. And Unaccomplished.

All the girls were near my age... and most had husbands... kids... careers. I have none of those, unless, you know, you count my fuzzbutts, which most normal people do not. ;O) hee hee! But yeah, the only people I actually KNEW were Trollup (who was Libby's Room-Roomie in Cedar City when Coats was my Room-Roomie) and Irene, who I sort of new from campus as well. Trollup is having a baby girl in January and working for her Investment Firm in St. George. Irene is teaching, I think. Actually, almost EVERYONE there is teaching... at John Hancock Charter School... because that is where Libby teaches and therefore most of the attendees were from work. So I felt cheap AND unsuccessful... and hurting (back spasms)... and embarrassed to be diabetic because they kew and kept asking about everything I ate (which wasn't much at ALL) "Should you eat that? Don't eat that!" Okay, hello, I am not perfect at this at ALL, but I was counting and keeping within my allowance of carbs. SIGH. Anyway, bad shower. As in worse than usual. OH, I forgot to say about my strip poker cards, they were all very offended. It was a joke... I meant it as a joke and also a little bit of a memory since we had poker [of the completley clothed-variety] nights as an apartment in Cedar. But then I looked like a cheap, unaccomplished, SLUT to boot! GRRRRR!!!

You've Experienced 56% of Life

You have a good deal of life experience, about as much as someone in their late 20s. You've seen and done enough to be quite wise, but you still have a lot of life to look forward to.

How Much Life Experience Do You Have?

Oh, and by the way that quiz up above is dedicated to SooZee the Slut. Hee hee hee! And that dedication is dedicated to colorchrome. Yeah.

Anyway, I left early from the shower. I really did need to leave as my family was going out to dinner... but I left earlier than I needed to because I just wanted to get out of there.

Tomorrow my cousin, T-La's 3rd little boy is being blessed in church tomorrow. Blessing in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is a bit like Christening. They give the child a name and give him blessings like asking God to help him lead a righteous life, be safe and healthy, etc. I love those boys. I will have to get picture of new baby Elijah... because I don't have them yet. So that is a picture of boy #2, Caleb, at the same age, and really they all look like carbon copies of each other in that family. Good thing the original was GEORGOUS because they ALL are. I tell you, T-La and Les have a VERY successful recipe for little boys! So I have that to look forward to. And Meg and Jake will be there, I assume (yay!). So yeah, fun stuff. Trying to think more about that than the rest of my crap week.

I NEED CONTROL OF MY LIFE!!! It turns out on top of my other issues the doctor thinks I am ADHD. GRAND, eh?! And the way I live my life from health to depression to my messy messy chaotic life is screwing it over even worse. SO, in additicion to my health stuff... I just started this FlyLady thing. Hopefully I can do it.

I need it.

And I need to take my pills and go to bed early so I can wake up and get to the church in Salt Lake in TIME!