"Why can't Mormons send flowers?"

Today is the start of General Conference for the Church. And I woke up in time (ooh, long scary story though. Later.) I am not even in bed listening to it on the radio but upstairs, dressed, and watching it on TV and paying attention.

Okay, well, right NOW it is between sessions, so I am cooking crescent rolls (mmmm...) and half-watching and giggling at Benji (the Hunted!) and his sophisticated thought processes (compared to the idiocy of the majority of the few humans in the show) with The Roomie.

Crap.

I burned them.

Anyway, so this morning I was supposed to go to work... EARLY... to do this last big JMG harvest.

When I was dragging myself out of bed I texted my sister-boss a few times asking "are we still doing this thing?" because 1. it was cold 2. I was exhausted 3. I was hurting a lot
...but got no answer so assumed it was. I put on my jacket for the first time this year and drove out to Thanksgiving Point. But when I arrived, NOBODY was there.

And it was snowing... raining... sleeting... hailing... and I kept trying to call Rinny with no answer. I was going to leave, assuming it had been changed or *I* was wrong, but was waiting just a few minutes to see if she'd call back. To kill time I spun donuts (mmm... donuts...) in the parking lot behind the dinosaur museum. The lot was crazy slick with the hail on the sleet like little marbles in slime.

I thought I heard some construction equipment crunching something... but other than that, nobody I knew came by and I decided to leave.

But when I got to the other side of the museum I saw it was not construction.

There was a car laying there, upside-down in front of it. Having slipped off the slime and marble freeway and flipping onto the the little frontage road at work. The lights were still on. There were no police or ambulance. I felt so sick. A man pulled up behind them before I got across the street, then I was behind him. I asked if anyone had been called. He said yes, the guy (IN THE CAR) had run in to the museum to call an AMBULANCE (meaning there was someone else in there? I don't know.). I asked what I could do, what I should do. He said nothing, and that he would handle it. I pulled over to the side to be out of the way, but was having a major panic attack. THAT was when Rinny called back. She thought *I* had been in the accident and kept trying to say she'd come get me. I explained, but not well... I kept almost throwing up. I was very freaked out and not handling things well. But I stayed till the police and ambulance got there... and could calm down some myself... then drove VERY carefully home, grateful for 4-wheel drive.

But once home I watched Conference which was good. Elder Eyring is the new 2nd Counselor and Elder Cook(?) is the new 12.

Seeing Elder Wirthlin, I think it was? that was so shaky and so so so... old... made me want to cry though.

But still, yeah, good start to the Conference. Granted, I would have to re-watch... or read excerpts (which I will)... to tell you what the heck I learned from it (partially because my unfocused brain... partially because the dogs and birds were being hilariously distracting and kept making The Roomie and I laugh), but over all it was good.

Last night was good, too, for a change. Work was NOT so good. The field trip kids were funny, of course, but I was hurting the whole time and I am still feeling rather unhinged and unstable and... well, started crying when Grandma Betty said I miscounted cups for ice cream for one class. Yeah, THAT'S healthy. *rolls eyes* That's what this whole week has like. But LAST night was good.

I got to just chill with the girls, CC and Stewbert. We talked about dumb things, cruised the mall a little, spent a lot of money at Archiver's (I spent a ton. But I have a plan for a little, CUTE, scrapbook of the suggies. hee hee!), and finished up with Sonic.

I admit my foot, though it was wrapped (and heavily medicated) the whole night hated me today, but still glad I got to play.

phoney smiles

Finally got a new cell phone today. Still with Cricket (and my same number) and still the 2nd cheapest one they had but able to hold a charge for over an hour! GEEZ. And it is a LOT better than my piece of crap used one I had so therefore I am very happy with it. It isn't bad. It's this one! It is not, particularly cute or cool. It is, however FUNCTIONAL which is a big step up and with the recent problems, and this being the 3rd and final time to deal with THIS crap well I am just happy to have some resolution, you know?

Anyway, I am pretty dead, so I will write more tomorrow. Feeling a little too much like crap to continue at present.

Okay, so it's Tuesday. but I lost my steam anyway.

tomorrow is doctors.

depression sucks... even though the doctors tomorrow are my foot and head,

"It Tastes like Salsa!"

Yaaarrr people! Ahoy! 'Tis International Talk Like a Pirate Day! My favorite fake holiday of all for all my landlubbers and scallywags alike! But as it is after the time of midnight, I will cease with the talking in pirate manner and instead just talk ABOUT the day as it is much much easier. Avast!
Savvy!

First of all I woke up and was doing normal house stuff, but then I got up and got to doing really important things... like dressing my Gaia character in Pirate clothes.

And then I emailed or texted, like, everyone for whom I had contact info for wishing them a happy Talk Like a Pirate Day. Okay, so not EVERYONE, but practically. Even those I probably shouldn't. (ie: Gilch. You know, if someone's religion forbids them to celebrate even REAL holidays like Christmas, it is probably poor taste to textually harass them about silly holidays. I will probably apologize for that tomorrow. ANYWAY, yeah.)

THEN, I dressed in my best piratey garb. I wore my "My Dad is a Pirate" shirt (made by Phoenix who sells them (don't worry chica, the props are free *wink*), my pirate scarf (around my waist) Rinny made me for last Christmas as well as the Lobster necklace I stole from her, and my awesome pirate hat and stuff CC and Stewie gave me when my house flooded in May. YAY! So at least I LOOKED the part... SORT of.

Unfortunately, then it was time for Doctors (which is why this day did not include WORK, you see. Because, oddly, TLAPD is not usually a recognized holiday off from work). So off I went to that. I texted Mali about our plans (which were big!) from the waiting room.

I did try to pretend I was a pirate who had been shipwrecked when I was in the pool (instead of a dancing water nymph or a mermaid like I usually pretend) but physical therapy techs kept coming in and making me self-conscious.

Finally, I was done and Mali was done teaching and we were ready to roll! I mean set sail!

Our plans? A special pre-theatrical (should it ever make it there) screening of Pirates of the Great Salt Lake at Broadway Centre Cinemas downtown where dressing up like pirates was to be encouraged and one of the leads, Trenton James would be there. Also Hot Topic at the Gateway and adding to our pirate embellishments. And finding somewhere yummy to eat.

And so after plotting our course, we lifted anchor and shoved off to adventure! YAAAARRR!!!!

Mali drove. And as we drove we played Veggie Tales to get us in the mood!
"I think you look like Cap'n Crunch!"

We bought our tickets first thing (which was good, later it was CRAZY) and went to the mall in search of buried treasure! I mean food! We ate at Costa Vida which is always good. Then on to Hot Topic!

Okay, so if we REALLY wanted lots of pirate stuff we would have hit a costume store. But we DID get temporary tattoos... and Mali got some REALLY cute stuff, like earrings and a Transformer jacket that I would covet if the biggest size they had was not 2X. But, yeah. Good stuff. Also, the clerk was impressed with our outfits and said "okay, see YOU 2 obviously know what day it is!" because apparently nobody did. Then she invited us to, like the store worker people planned to, dress up in the costume stuff and take a picture. And so, we did. (Along with a headless (and legless) wench!)Molly... who I suppose was saying Arrrrgh, but looks a little more like she was confused...


and Me... I swear standing this way FELT normal, I don't know why it LOOKS like I am walking on eggshells. (and my REAL hat (the one I wore to the show) is cuter, but anyway)!

After Hot Topic we went to the theater and the line was LONG but we got to saunter past it. There were people (pirates... and one inexplicable person with cat ears?) sword fighting all over. NERDS OF A FEATHER, baby! IT WAS HILARIOUS! It was somehow extra entertaining that this wasn't like a POPULAR thing like Star Wars Fans or something getting ready for the next Star Wars. NOBODY has seen this, and yet, we are all dressed up to see this possibly TOTALLY lame movie because dangitall IT HAS PIRATES!!! And, okay, it looked stupidly funny.

Observe.
And, yes, it actually WAS pretty hilarious. We laughed a LOT. Granted, being surrounded by people cheering "YARR!" at parts, how could you NOT?! But yeah.

(For those of you wondering, yes, it earned the PG-13, so, like I do NOT expect, like, my sister to go. Use that as a guide, should it ever make it big.) Before we went IN, we went int to rest room and got properly inked. This is my arm.

I also have a skull and cross-well-SWORDS on my ankle. Shiver me timbers!

They showed it on a DVD player (which kept making us giggle at the not-so-professionalism) but on the big screen to many a cheer. And Mali and I decided, despite his protest when we asked him that Trenton James may very well be the Ask a Ninja NINJA.


Which, being a PIRATE, too, well, kind of is a conflict of interests, but seriously, if you heard him talk in real life... AWFULLY suspicious. He said "I get that a lot."

(btw, During certain parts of the movie we also decided he could be Will Ferrell's illegitimate son. But we didn't ask him about that, just the Ninja connection. Hmmmm...)

ANYWAY it was all VERY funny. Then we went to 7-11 in a dodgy part of town and Mali got hugged by a panhandler (yes, hugged. Not mugged. But I question the difference at times) because she is freaking charitable. We got Slurpees and BY THE WAY, kudos to 7-11 for making a DELIGHTFUL Crystal Light Slurpee so us dieters and diabetics could join in the fun! YUM!

It was a probably the BEST TLAPD ever. I don't know that I'll be able to top it the next time September 19th rolls around, but I am sure glad we did it this time. I have been having a crappy go of things lately and while one day of piratude didn't fix my medical, financial, or emotional state... well, it sure didn't hurt.*

*okay, so it hurt a LITTLE. My head is pretty bad today. And I spent money I did not have yet. But STILL! I NEEDED THIS.

Vinyl-ee Bought it!

Today after a very hard day at work and then a hard work out at the pool I went to the library. Well, at the library I found a fun sounding record, so I had to go buy a record player.

Okay, so that sounds a little more impulsive than it really was. I have had my eye on this ever since I asked for it... and Rinny got it for Christmas. Then I asked for one for my birthday, and was given another boom box. So I decided I needed to buy it today.

I was in definite need of some retail therapy.

Today was the start of another hard all week day camp, e-Missions: Moon, Mars, and Beyond. This one. It IS fun but stressful. Besides, today some parent dropped off their child before we could find out how old he was... and that this Dad had thought this 3-5th GRADE class was 3-5 YEAR olds. So we had a 4 year old! It was pretty hilarious but pathetic.

Some people need to learn to read closer. SIGH.

Anyway, it was hard and I have been very sad today. So I bought that. And some fancy-like diet soda in a glass bottle. And sushi. And now I intend to go set it up. So GOOD NIGHT.

Darwin needs his butt kicked today for giving me a headache...

or at least making it worse.

Some days I LOVE my job. I love holding baby animals and the kids crack me up. Yesterday we had a 10 minuet discussion on why we could not feed the lambs and calves crayons even if they were green like hay or yellow like corn. Hee hee hee! I love the new baby piglets and petting the baby lambs. I love making Tom the turkey scare the older kids when really all he wants is to be treated like a puppy dog. And I USUALLY love dinosaurs. I love their size and new discoveries, and I love the air conditioning in the museum.

But other days I feel like screaming. Like when I am writing 7th grade curriculum about the difference between the normal Linnaean Taxonomy (ie: Kingdom, Phylum, Subphylum, Class, Subclass, Order, Family, Genus, and Species) and classification of fossilized organisms because of the difficulty of classifying non-living entities and I realize I BARELY know more than my students and if I have to read one more paragraph from Origin of the Species I will find Charles Darwin grave, dig him up, and kill him again. Yeah, today is a BAD headache day and a bad WORK day because my brain is feeling a bit overloaded.

SO, I am taking a little break right now at work from Phylum Arthropoda and Class Trilobita. But just to vent. NOW I should really get BACK to work so I am not here till 8. I have things I need to get done at home, too, you know. I need to make a bath of BML, pick up meds at the pharmacy, and see if I can FIND my missing tax return check that I JUST got and have now lost. I know it's not REALLY, like, free money. It is just MY money BACK, but still, pretty excited to get it. After all, since it has sort of already been paid and so it's not, like, budgeted. And therefore it's LIKE free money. Money that doesn't need to be as accounted for. And therefore can be used toward the the trip to California the end of this month! ANYWAY, back to work. Stupid taxonomy. Stupid curriculum. Stupid me losing a 400 dollar check. I could just cry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In fact, I *did* cry. A common occurrence lately.

However, things DID get better. For one thing, work ended. Hee hee! After work I was headed home, but my mind was on Fresno and the trip. I can't do much about that right now, and I haven't found the check even yet. But I DID get inspired to do more on his PRESENT! And so I went home by way of Zurchers. And the dollar store. And PartyLand. And Big Lots.

Yeah, I went a little crazy. But if there is one girlfriendy thing I *can* do it is PRESENTS. Most of them are silly, private jokey things. The 2 "real" gifts are Charlotte's Web and the COOLEST tennis ball SLING SHOT for the dogs! It is, seriously, almost a weapon, it is AWESOME. And it will actually CHALLENGE the monster ponies to chase. Made by Hyperdog and I think I'd want my OWN, but I doubt the little dogs, Trinket, Shasta, and Suzy would fetch the balls for me as far as I would want to shoot them and *I* sure am not retrieving them. hee hee!

Anyway, yeah, I think he will really like the presents as long as the airport doesn't confiscate them or something. I am actually thinking of mailing it even though I *am* going, just to avoid taking the present on the plane. Because I wrapped everything really cool. And now I am remembering the last time I wrapped a gift (When we flew to Hawaii for Christmas) security OPENED them. And this on will even LOOK suspicious. And there are doggy TREATS in there, too, so if they have sniffer dogs the dogs may be saying "this bag has treats and toys!" and the guards will think I have drugs or something. Hmmm... so I really may mail stuff. Bummer. Haven't decided yet.

In other news, my computer has suddenly... and when I say suddenly I mean the last 10 minutes... started acting VERY slow and bad and near frozen. I want to restart… I NEED to restart. I am checking for spyware now. But I don’t want to lose my entry. I SHOULD have been saving, but I haven’t been. Arrrgh. Sometimes I swear, the computer HATES me.

Back (again) but I should really just post. Post and go to bed, though I am not tired. But it is too late to take anything for sleep. So, it's my own fault. SIGH. Good night... or morning... WHATEVER.