Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Pain and Doctors from Head to Toe... Literally

Doctors yesterday.
Doctors today.

SIGH. Seriously, can I just trade in my body for a newer model? Because this one SUCKS!

Yesterday was the Head thing.
I got through it and I am glad I did. It was the right thing. But I am glad my dad came over before the procedure and gave me a father's blessing with the priesthood. And I am glad I trust Dr. YeahBaby's SKILL. Because his bedside... a LIIIIITTLE scary. Like when I was laying on the table, face down, covered in sheets and iodine and unable to be under sedation. And they are threading an epidural tube through my neck up under my skull, and hit a nerve. And so what does Dr. YeahBaby say to his (rather annoying)PA/nurse man IN FRONT (or, you know, BACK) of me?
"Do you know why we don't do this procedure very often? Because people DIE. Do this wrong and she could die."

I am laying there thinking "Um, hey people, remember how I am NOT sedated because I can't be for this?! And I can hear you? And I am scared so bad I might pee my pants if I weren't dehydrated? SO MAYBE YOU COULD NOT KEEP MENTIONING HOW I COULD DIE FROM THIS?!"

I mean, yes, I know I COULD. We have discussed it many times. But it was one of those things where the benefits outweigh the risks. I signed a lot of papers to say so.

But I'd rather not be reminded while laying there scared and half naked on a table, you know?!

BUT his chewing out DID impress the seriousness of the operation on the helper I guess (or else Dr. YeahBaby just didn't let him help anymore, I am not quite sure) because the rest went perfectly. My headache is gone... MAYBE for 9 months again. I have to take it easy a few days, and the ordeal left me pretty drained. But it was a success. And I would recommend Dr. YeahBaby to any who needed a Pain specialist (and, you know, give them his REAL name).

Then came today. The past week, for some reason I have been just HOBBLING around. Like a broke my right foot but couldn't remember when. Hurts to do ANYTHING, and making my toes have pins and needles, too, for some reason. So, I finally got an appointment with a a FOOT doctor. Never had THAT before.

Because I sure did need another STUPID ailment.

So what "fun" thing do I get to have now is a little, but MEAN, tumor on a nerve in the ball of my foot called a neuroma. It is benign, but still causes the same pain.

The Dr. Foot told me that what we could do was to give my foot cortisone injections for awhile to hopefully postpone the time when I would have to have surgery. However, the shots would do BAD things to my blood sugar. I told him that as I had, just yesterday HAD an injection that very likely had done so, that might be a little bit overkill for my diabetes. He agreed. He didn't really want to rush the surgery, either because at present I have full feeling in my feet and that is something I can LOSE with the diabetes... and removing the offending nerve, well, OBVIOUSLY not helping THAT. So, for now he has my foot in a brace. And FlyLady wins... I finally have to wear shoes in the house. And I try this wacky brace a while till I get shots... and eventually, probably surgery... and stupid special shoes.

But right now, there IS no alternative. I hurt so bad this week I can hardly walk, and am needing a a cane or an arm to balance on half the time. I can't give field trips like this, and I can't drive to work on the levels of pain meds I am on.

So there you go. Doctored and doctored from head to toe, quite literally. But with the brace, I can walk (even if I look a little wobbly, still) and my head is considerably improved, so either way my doctors win this round and I have to be happy. I wish I was happier.

Just feeling a little discouraged at being who I am right now, though. Sorry to be such a whiner. I know I am very blessed, I really do. Just... having a tricky time of it at present.


  1. Holy sheesh!! I can't believe your experience, how absolutely awful!

    I'm SO rooting for you! May that tumor just miraculously disappear. How cool would that be?

    Great big e-hugs!!!

  2. Wow. I'm sorry. I agree with laurie on all that she said. Hang in there you'll make it.

  3. Love you chica. Hang in there.

  4. blarg! I don't think ANY of us blame you for complaining!

    break its knee-caps!

    metaphorically speaking of course... because I'm not sure exactly what it is that would have the knee-caps for you to break.

    love you!

  5. yeah... tumors have no knee-caps.
    SIGH. I wish they did. I would LOVE to break them. Because this whole thing just gets... too much, you know?

    But I am very VERY grateful to have such awesome friends.