Saturday, October 7, 2006

Gimee da Dough, Man.

Diabetes or not what I want right this very minute while I sit on my couch watching The Monkees on TV is Cookie Dough!

I won't even cook it either. (even though I have a sad bag of cranberries, almonds, and a new bottle of the best dressing till the ban on spinach is past) I just want some cookie dough If I trusted my judgment to drive I would go to the grocery store and buy the prepackaged kind. the most expensive kind, like "Turtle" with Caramel and Walnuts and such and just eat it all. I am jonesing for some serious CHOCOLATE... caramel... okay, pretty much anything I should not have, I want tonight. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired and ready to throw a bit of a tantrum. A tantrum with chocolate, preferably.

Unfortunately, there's not much I can do about it all. My head is still hurting greatly. I am still very dizzy, very sick. My MRI and MRV are on Monday, the day after tomorrow. That part is still all mysterious. And the Diabetes, well that has been the same and will be for quite some time (though I *have* been losing weight through diet and (limited for the time being) exercise).
So, school, again, has been postponed. Hopefully, I will be luckier Spring Semester. I feel like I don't get very far in life lately before my wheels start spinning in the mud!!!

However, despite all the frustration I get with the spinning I have to say I have exceptional friends and family cheering me on. Heck pretty much everybody I list as blog links over there are ALSO real live people who say encouraging stuff in notes in emails. My mom, well, OVER-mothers, and brings me food (that I rarely eat because I currently hate food... (if only she knew to bring her sickie child a large log of pre-made cookie dough to eat straight! HA!) and therefore don't eat much) and runs errands for me. My dad and little brother are coming over tomorrow to give me the Sacrament because I can not go to church. Plus there are those who are also very supportive, very very sweet, and cute, which scares me, because I don't know what I think about that situation and how to reconcile attraction with gratitude and I am done with that thought process tonight because I am not active enough in the church yet, sorry. Over all, life sucks... but my many friends and family do not. THANK YOU, EVERYBODY! I LOVE YOU! (ALL, Y'ALL!) Thanks. It makes feeling miserable not so... well... Miserable!!! hee hee hee hee!

I should attempt going to bed. I can't help but thinking though that there is not much point when I have slept most of the day. SIGH.

But at least when I DO go to bed I will reward myself with the chance to listen to more of the audio book I am presently into, The Tale of Despereaux by Kate DiCamillo. Your basic beautiful children's book that is way better for adults like, well, ME. And now I guess I will take my arsenal of meds, make the suggies supper, and pretend to sleep.


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