Sunday, March 18, 2007

Poop & Puke... Pardon my Fringe!

Okay, I am skipping Sunday School because I needed to come home for an Excedrin. I have a migraine. (but not The Headache, so still better!) I should lay down for a migraine nap in the dark and quiet, but as I am exhausted, I just know I won't wake up for Sacrament Meeting no matter how many alarms are going off. Therefore (Okay, just a little English lesson I gave myself via the internet...

there·for [thair-fawr] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
for or in exchange for that or this; for it: a refund therefor.

[Origin: 1125–75; ME therfor. See there, for] Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

there·fore [thair-fawr, -fohr] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
in consequence of that; as a result; consequently: I think; therefore I am.

[Origin: 1125–75; ME ther(e)fore, var. of therfor therefor]
hence, whence. Therefore, wherefore, accordingly, consequently, so, then all introduce a statement resulting from, or caused by, what immediately precedes. Therefore (for this or that reason) and wherefore (for which reason) imply exactness of reasoning; they are esp. used in logic, law, mathematics, etc., and in a formal style of speaking or writing. Accordingly (in conformity with the preceding) and consequently (as a result, or sequence, or effect of the preceding), although also somewhat formal, occur mainly in less technical contexts. So (because the preceding is true or this being the case) and then (since the preceding is true) are informal or conversational in tone. Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

Yeah. "Therefore.") I need to just take meds, stay awake and pray Heavenly Father makes this one subside so I can go back to His house today. And that, my friends, is why I am blogging in the middle of my church meetings. (I mean, time-wise... not physically. I don't bring a laptop to church. hee hee hee!)

But HOLY HANNAH what a weekend it has been!

Saturday I was scheduled to work an Environmental Science scout class from 9am to 2pm and then a Cowboy birthday party from 2 to 6. Knowing that it takes me awhile to get out there (commute + construction) and that waking up might prove an impossibility, Friday night I fed the critters then grabbed my stuff and headed over to the Padres' so that no matter how tired I was, at least they could DRAG me out of bed if needed.

I stayed in BoyKid's room. It made me miss him terribly, seeing all his old toys, mostly boxed up as the padres prepare to move. I listened to part of the "Side-Ways Stories from Wayside School" book on tape of his several times (the rest of the book is missing, so I just listened to the end over and over.) because I was bored and could not sleep but FINALLY fell asleep... and too quickly it was morning.

[More about ^THAT^ after church!]

I was, of course, exhausted already but add to that all day at the Children's Discovery Garden with some 50 Boy Scouts, hiking around, trying to get them to listen in various classes and activities about water pollution, habitats and niches and such... YEAH. DANG tired. We made biodegradable plastic out of cornstarch, counted fishes in a pond, set up GPS hunts with different environmental careers at each geocaching point, had debates about the best method for cleaning up an oil spill, and listened to boys present reports on endangered or threatened animals in Utah. And before I knew it I was sick and sitting on a bench trying to get over sunstroke. I am pretty burned anyway (because, dummy that I am, I didn't think to put on sunscreen for work), but the dizziness and dehydration was worse. I didn't even notice because I didn't feel hot. In fact, when it really hit hard it made me have chills!

I will NOT be that stupid again. I just have to work past the blisters and sore muscles associated with my very physical job... but I will definitely now make sure I wear sunscreen (Thank you, Mr. Luhrmann) and carry a water bottle at ALL times.

The sunstroke didn't really floor me until it was almost time to go to my other assignment of the day, back at Farm Country. So, I just finished coordinating some GPS unit thingies, and headed over to the "Birthday Barn/Classroom." I am still, of course, TRAINING, so I was really just *assisting* Cowboy Matt as he, quite literally, showed me the ropes (and ponies and hay and goats and balloons and and cake and Coachman tractor/car thingy and face paints).

[It is past bedtime now and the Gliders need their food and I need my sleep if I can get it. I have developed a very persistent, very ANNOYING eye twitch. It has been all week now, but today and yesterday it went on ALL DAY! So I may actually have to go to the doctor for it because it is beginning to affect my vision. Anyway, I will continue this TOMORROW. (Though I work tomorrow too, so later.)]

Also that is when Fresno FINALLY called me back (I left a gazillion messages saying, in essence, that while I am NOT a You-Must-Call-Everyday girl, when your last message contains something something DANGEROUS like robbers (or hurricanes) YOU CALL or I PANIC!). He is fine, but understandably stressed.

Anyway, the party was BIG. 24 kids, plus parents. They were random cousins and such, so they were all different ages. And the birthday boy/girl was, in fact, BOTH. As in they were twins... not a hermaphrodite. 5 year old twins. Very whiny ones at that. But they were not the worst. See, besides the games, one of the big things about birthday parties at the farm is that the birthday kid gets to pick ANY one of our animals to be brought INSIDE the room for a visit! A pony, lamb, calf, bunny, chicken, etc. Well, not surprising the most popular is the pony (even though they get pony RIDES, too.) and the only pony at TGP who comes inside rooms is Chief. Chief is a cute pony. I am pretty sure, however, that Chief HATES me. Anyway, he doesn't listen to me.

Cowboy Matt taught [okay, TRIED very hard to teach] me how to harness a pony. I think I pulled every muscle in my body from the waist up. Ponies are FREAKISHLY strong, it turns out. And to give me practice, after Cowboy Matt harnessed Chief he UN-harnessed him and made me do it and lead him inside. FREAKISHLY strong... and hates me.

I FINALLY got that dang pony inside and all the kids oohed and ahhed and then Chief lifted his tail and pooped on the floor and they eeewed... except one kid... WHO BARFED. He seriously started throwing up everywhere because he saw PONY POOP. It was gross, but honestly, it was SO FUNNY! I just have to think that kid has a HARD life ahead of him if just poop makes him retch. Oh and as everyone ran outside, his mom said "He has a very sensitive stomach. Sometimes when he potties if he looks he throws up, too." HA HA HA HA HA HA! SO glad that's not MY kid. We took Chief back to the pasture and then we had to clean the floor while the party played on the farm so that it would be all nice when they came back to open presents and stuff.

After that, Cowboy Matt and I went to do the dishes (just the cake knife, spatula, etc.) and then he sent me off with one of the volunteer kiddlets to feed the calves! That was fun, but SLIMY. Baby cows slobber a LOT. But they sure are cute, especially the 2 little Jerseys.

Then Cowboy Matt attempted to teach me to drive stick. FIRST TIME EVER, I drove a clutch! Just the little Coachman, something like a tractor and a golf cart combined. But it was hard! I still suck at it. But I am trying.

OH! And then around the farm, I saw vomit kid again. He was by the cows and suddenly pointed to a cow patty and said "Mommy, LOOK!" *BLEH!* Yup, he threw up again! HOW FUNNY IS THAT?! That kid must be trouble. I mean, if his stomach remains that queasy it's not like he could ever have a pet... or a baby in diapers. Like the book title says...

When the very long day was over I went to the padres' because my stuff was still there. But before I gathered it up I watched Office Space on cable but fell asleep. Mom woke me up and I went home to go to bed early.

But when I got there, there was a letter from BoyKid! Just for me! And he's speaking Fringe! (And no, not Parker-isms for Sex!) As he said, after much cute and spiritual stuff, "Oh! and I pretty much love (how did you put it? Lock your heart love?) any I lock heart love our Sorelli." AWWW! Yay for my little bro being appropriately friends with Sister Missionaries! The Fringe will Rear Again!!!

Then Fresno called again and we chatted awhile before I finally went to sleep so I could wake up for church. And I DID! ALL 3 hours... oh, except, you know, skipping SS.

Then I went to the padres for dinner and me and mom were hanging out and flipping channels when she settled on some stupid Disney channel movie. It was hilarious though, because we had only seen about 30 seconds of this boy who kept getting thirsty. Mom said "Oh I bet he's Diabetic."
I said "I bet he's a MERMAID. It's Disney."

I was RIGHT. Hee hee hee hee hee hee! It was called 13th Year or Year 13 or something and it was about a boy who turns into a merman. How funny is that?!

"Mer-MAN, Pop! *cough cough* Mer-MAN!" - Zoolander


  1. LOL. Poop. there's a reason I won't have dogs and cats again. I hate the poop. Doesn't make me yak, but ... ew. Love the cuddliness of furbabies, not so much the poop.

    And I'm very glad Fresno is okay. :)

  2. I feel bad for poop barfer's mom. Honestly. I mean if you barf if you even see your own poop there's gotta be something going on there.

    Sounds like a super busy time!

  3. Great post, very funny! I’m actually working on a project with Scholastic – – to raise awareness about a soccer tournament as well as to introduce parents to Maya & Miguel, a multicultural animated TV series on PBSKids. Here’s a link to the learn more about the show –

    Even if you’re not actively involved in the US Soccer League in Lewiston, UT, I hope you and the family will visit the Maya & Miguel “Kick It” booth on May 19. Here’s some information on the soccer event -

    If you do blog about the soccer event or the Maya & Miguel show, please make it clear how you learned about the event or show. Our goal is to be open and honest with everyone we reach.

    Many thanks,

    Kerri Roberts, BoldMouth