Tuesday, January 22, 2008

"Do you want to color a Dinosaur, Senator?"

Today I had therapy with Dr. Apparently. WHY is it that the only people who seem to be able to help me with my medical issues don't have actual medical degrees?! I mean my physical therapist is the BEST (if only my insurance helped with him) and is REALLY who "diagnosed" that crazy headache thing awhile ago, that Dr.YeahBaby could fix... and Dr. Apparently is a Psychologist, but I think he understands more than ANY of my doctors and pretty much told me what to tell them to try for meds.


Anyway, I really like Dr. Apparently. But I do NOT like therapy. I think it helps... or WILL help... but I think it hurts. It actually HURTS to talk about some stuff, you know?

But I go. I like, though, that he doesn't JUST talk "fluff." He KNOWS medical stuff, and he talks it. That's his specialty... coping with chronic pain and we talk about the science of it. Things like my low thyroid and Fibromyalgia. We'll see. I just want to feel GOOD for a change. Healthy... moderately happy. You know?

After my appointment I went to work, though. It was a Educator Night. BLEH. It was not very good. But it was better than I expect TOMORROW to be. LEGISLATOR NIGHT. I am NOT excited to teach a bunch of politicians how to make seed necklaces and stuff. In truth I am so nervous I am sick. But there are almost NONE of us available that night to do so, so there is no getting out of it. I don't know what I am going to do. I am so scared. I hate adults. Especially official ones.

Anyway, on the way home, Rinny called. Her battery died. So turned back and jumped her car. But DANG IT IS COLD OUT THERE!!! I mean, it was cold ANYWAY, but the wind starts whipping around out there at TGP and you just FREEZE. It was so cold while we tried to fix that car. When will it ever get warm?

For that matter, when will I feel happier?
Hurt less?

I know... give things time. New pills. Life changes. But... I have been ME a long time.


  1. I love the video.

    Don't be afraid of the legislators, they are just people. You'll do just fine. (I would come down and help you if I could)

    I read your article on Hip Homemaker it was great!

  2. Just remember that YOU are an adult too! And even though they are "officals," you KNOW what you're talking about when it comes to your job! So don't worry about what they will think of you. Put on a smile and show them that you know what you're doing - because you really do! And I'll bet they're really nice anyway.

    Therapy is hard at first because talking about stuff you've been hiding is HARD, but when you finally do, you end up feeling so much lighter and better - like maybe the problem is still there, but suddenly it is manageable.

  3. Therapy sucks. But it's sooo worth it. Sounds like you have a good therapist, that makes all the difference, IMO.