Monday, June 2, 2008

The Secret Life of Bees [and Boys]

I have had dumb boys on the brain lately. Like, as in, DUMB ones, specifically. Today it bothered me that it was Fresno's birthday. It bothered me even more so that I knew what I was going to give him.... I mean, like, I knew what I had planned. I had parts of this little thing. A silly homemade thing that WOULD have meant a lot, you know... if WE had meant a lot. Ugh. Yuck. BLEH.

And then there was yesterday. Our very first official GEOLOGY Merit Badge Class! We've done Environmental Science and Citizenship in the World but Geology is new and we are launching this big new program. The only hazard for me (besides the unearthly early hour of it starting, I mean! Ugh.) was that Geology meant everything made me think of f'retarded TexasBoy as he was a Geologist, like PROFESSIONALLY, for an oil company who works with NASA. He had all these dumb geology jokes about, like cleavage and schist and I thought of ALL of them during that class. (Thanks, TexAss. You may have broke my heart, but you left me with a butt-load of rock puns! hee hee hee!) But it was a fun class.

We had them pan for gold (they got real gold), mine a rock collection out of a sandy brick thing (we made them. Mixed sand and plaster) and label it in pretty cool little boxes we gave them, they learned about open pit vs. strip mining, stuff like that. THEN we got somewhat distracted from the rocks because 1st we found a couple of garter snakes. THEN one of our new girls found a toad. And THEN... OUR BEEKEEPER CAME TO REPLACE OUR HIVE!!!

Well, not the hive, but the inhabitants. Because, yes, they ALL DIED! And then I wanted to bawl. Seriously. Anyway, yeah, he came to give us new bees. (Heh heh. NewBees. Newbies. Hee hee!) And he was out there, cleaning out the hive and then, like INSTALLING them. Which I found so fascinating I proceeded to follow him like a paparazzi. The writing the 1st grade field trip curriculum lesson plans at the garden has made me slightly OBSESSED with bees. Plus, not that it was really ABOUT bees PER SAY, but I really DID like Secret Life of Bees and highly recommend it. And now I want to know ALL about bees, beekeeping, and honey and probably made the beekeeper feel uncomfortable with the number of questions I asked him.

Anyway, back to rocks. We DID get them (and me) back on track. They learned more stuff, I promise. We took them to the Museum and even with a few rowdy scouts we managed to evade any run-ins with Sgary.

It was good if I weren't feeling so crappy. Very very headache and sick. And stupid and depressed to boot. I just am rather tired of being me. But, yeah, that's pretty par for the course. Yeah. But I still do not want to leave this post on a depressed note, so too mildly inappropriate bee jokes!

What kind of Bees give milk?


Knock knock.

Who's there?

Bumble Bee.

Bumble Bee who?

>>>Bumble Bee Cold if you don't put on some pants!


  1. ah the old bee milk joke... a classic steph k favorite. hee hee

  2. Sorry to hear about your bees. That's so sad. I watch a Discovery program (because I'm a nerd like that) and they are thinking that bees are dying out because of all the radio and satalite frequency are messing with the bees radar and they can't find their way back to their hives.

  3. on my mission, we got to "play" with bees. It was AWESOME!!!!!!

  4. Oh, beatlesdiva, that actually makes a ton of sense ...

    bees ... *shudder*. i know they're necessary and wonderful creatures, but tell that to me after one stings me and I'm in the ER...

  5. My dad lost all his hives this year. I kid you not. I guess the up side is I don't have to worry about my dog getting stung again? :-(

  6. I saw part of that Discovery program...I think that's what M. Night Shyamalan was kind of basing his latest movie on...

  7. uh yeah, I actually laughed at the "Boo Bees" joke.

    I'm a freakin' dork.