Saturday, January 30, 2010

Gastro Rant

You know, the chronic migraines, the Diabetes, the Depression, etc. they all get to me and frankly makes it hard to deal some days.  Somedays I don't feel so much like being funny.  This is one of those moments.  So for just a bit, pardon my rant while I whine a bit about how my Gastroparesis ****s up my life.

Gastroparesis, for me, means:
*I'm now vegetarian... but can't have fresh fruit or vegetables.
*keeping my fat under 40 grams a day... but never seeming to lose weight. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!
*Stomachaches that hurt so bad I can't go to church, can't go to work, can't go to a party, can't see my friends, can't think about returning to school, can't cope, can't HOPE.
*No social life. Wanna go out for dinner? Oh sure, you eat, I'll just bring an Ensure in my pocket! Because I don't seem awkward enough BEFORE!
*Pain.
*A acceptable reason to turn down anyone's cooking. I am allergic to FOOD! ;)
*The food pyramid is crumbling! Nowhole grains, no meat, no veggies, no fruit, little fats and sweets... poor little food Mummies... where will they live? Or be entombed, rather?

2 comments:

  1. Oh man! That blows atomic twinkie chunks...oh wait, you probably can't eat twinkies either...Wish there was some magical cure I could offer.

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